Sharpening up for Snowdonia on Saints Island

For the 9th round of my 2017 racing season I headed off past Edge Hill for the second and last occasion this year I'll be able to get to the Phoenix evening ten mile time trial. I was really fired up for this one as I'd finally acquired some bargain road shoes to replace the ones which lost their sole plates a couple of weeks ago, plus I could now use the neon yellow covers that Luke Jackson would approve of. I signed on and got number 19 behind St Helens Tri teammate Eddie Hirst, Phoenix head man Arthur Winstanley and St Helens CRC 's Janet Fairclough aboard her P5 bought from the Bicycle Lounge. I slotted the number into NO PINZ (also acting as a makeshift bum bag for keys/phone/money) and then rode a lap of the road race course to warm the legs up before returning to base for a piss stop and to swallow a Torq Chew bar picked up at Thatto Cycles today when I went to look at the Giant TCR range. But the most controversial piece of equipment would be the team surplus skinsuit from High on Bikes, which looks like something the race team used a couple of seasons ago but I grabbed it on the cheap as a replacement for the one-piece tri suit I wrecked at the Fred Whitton the day I went to Barrow. Come 7:10 it was time to make my way down to the start ramp and with Eddie, Arthur and Janet disappearing up the road at a fast rate of knots I clipped in, got the countdown and headed off for ten miles of pure speed.

The first job was to clear the MAMIL on a mountain bike who put me off line into the left-right downhill after the start, but then again it meant I didn't go near the road ridges which are so difficult to see round the corners. I reached 33mph on this first descent thanks to some lightning fast arm action and did all I could to hold this speed for the first mile, passing Dolan L'Etape Man just before the roundabout. This part of the course was critical as it gave me the opportunity to hold onto rather more speed than last time and fight the headwind with a perfect aero tuck against the nose of the saddle all the way to the Skelmersdale end of the the course, where even Motorbike Man was very courteous in letting me go. Now I was onto the southern leg for the fastest tailwind effort of the year and it was here that I finally caught the ever impressive Janet who was so unlucky not to beat the 25 minute mark, an outstanding effort on her part to get a 25:02. The middle roundabout is something I finally feel I've mastered and this gave me added impetus as did the huge lorry who passed me shortly before the slight uphill. The Rainford roundabout was a much more confident performance than last time's wobbly wheel effort and as such I was able to get to 26mph on the first part of the northerly run back to the Wheatsheaf, and from here it was simply a case of yank the base bar, hope the last meal doesn't come up the other way and just YOLO. That's right, I knew I was on for a sub-23 but was astonished to pass the chequerboard in a season's best-smashing time of 22:42, 38 seconds faster than a fortnight ago!

I rode back to base and caught up with St Helens Tri's Eddie Hirst, who performed extremely well to record a low 23 having barely been able to train over the last few weeks. It wasn't long before Tom and Rick appeared having locked out the second and third places on the podium behind Phil Williams who has just about become untouchable this year. Shortly afterwards another St Helens Tri teammate, Chris Green arrived having recovered from a warm-up where his wattage figures made him want to jack it in for the night, only to for him to also get a season's best time as well! And on a night full of surprises, we got tea and treacle tart at the finish. But the fun and games weren't over yet; I rode back to Ormskirk and decided I really needed a beer to get me through the report so went into Morrisons for a bottle of 13 Guns only to get ID'D by some girl who looked young enough to have stepped off Chris Green's favourite show, Love Island! Having left tonight's Reject award winner behind I went over the road to Bargain Booze just as Absolute 90's was playing The Shamen's Ebeneezer Goode, from you guessed it, (CHALLENGE) 25 years ago (Naughty naughty, very naughty). Now I didn't have any salmon in the fridge but did enjoy southern fried mini chicken fillets, potatoes and green pepper with my beer before sitting down to write this report. Only three days before I leave Chateau Chinook for the Welsh valleys!

Now for the results, in association with Bargain Booze:

Distance: the usual
Time: 22:42
Final position: 17th from 35 finishers
MAMILS: 2 in the first two miles
Lorries: 1
Star Performer of the Night: Janet for holding me off for so long and getting within 5 seconds of her PB

REJECT OF THE RACE: Chinook vs Challenge 25
(And you thought Liam Payne has it hard with everyone going on about his age gap to Cheryl)

Have a good evening tomorrow at Litherland if it doesn't get washed out, I'm off for some shut eye before the pre-Llanberis sleep pattern gets totally wrecked (in more ways than one). Over to you Tuesday chainey riders, how about taking over my slot for the last two weeks?