C is for Cool as you like in Cheshire

Round 11 of my 2014 schedule had me up at 6am this morning for a trip to the end-of-season Oulton Park Autumn Duathlon where over 600 runners and riders were entered for the sprint and standard distance events. After nearly missing out altogether thanks to some duff driving directions which don't mention that the A54 actually means "right at the Hungry Horse pub" (one of 726 I'm sure) I parked up, got the bike out of my new speed weapon the Ford Fiesta and readied myself for the briefing, which Simon Hill did atop the Race Director's Control Tower. Shortly afterwards it was off to the start line just as the last few drops of morning dew were melting and before we knew it, the horn went and we were underway.

The first lap is always pretty hectic, so I held back together with Victoria Jones and we gradually passed a few people who started out too fast including one of the Knowsley Harriers. As we crested the hill I saw a straight section of road and I commented "no chicanes YES!" You might not know this but the two chicanes on the backstretch are actually to slow motorbikes and fast cars down, and have been there since a fatal accident in a British F3000 race back in 1991. I would learn another notable fact about the infamous Knickerbrook Corner from an octogenarian at lunchtime, but more on that later. For now we got cheered on as we went under the bridge prior to the final right-hander and I ran into transition in a time of 16:32, 28 seconds ahead of my target and over two and a half minutes quicker than in 2011 - surely the chicane removal hadn't gained me that much time?

T1 was going well until I struggled to get my wide feet into my narrow road shoes; let's just saw that any all-new package for 2015 will include tri-specific shoes, Speedplay pedals and elastic bands on the chainstays of......wait and see. For now I got passed by some riders who were much quicker at getting out of the pitlane including a Cervelo P3 with a tower of spacers but I took him straight back on the dash to the hairpin; it would not be the only time we would meet on track today. The first lap was very entertaining as we came across fast cyclists and slow runners alike; a while back I could have accounted for both types of racer, but not anymore. After passing a lady on a Fuji Norcom (cracking bike that one) I finished the first lap in 6:32 and continued to pick off fast runners aboard basic road bikes, before engaging in some thrilling three-wide racing with some "GBR" entrants at the south end of the course. The next two laps were a bit hairy as several times I had to pass on the left or even up the middle rather than on the right as people wandered all over the course, but that's why I downloaded the 1991 layout of this track for an open-wheel racing game that had been gathering dust in my cupboard for a couple of years, so that I could learn all the ins and outs of where the track is wide or narrow, fast or twisty. This was particularly useful for attacking out of the aforementioned Knickerbrook Corner, a turn as fearsome as 130R at Suzuka, Eau Rouge at Spa or the Peraltada corner in Mexico; in other words attack if you dare. On the last trip round Knickerbrook, I was both the hunter and the hunted, as I passed the Norcom once more and got rounded up by Giant Trinity Man and the guy on the tiny P3 once more. Only trouble was, they passed me just as my chain slipped onto the little ring. I thought the b****r had come off but once back in the big ring I re-passed them three-wide on the final downhill towards the last corner, and I also came across Victoria who, unbeknown to me was on her way to age-group glory. Me and my fellow TT bike riders dismounted together at T2 and set about preparing for the final run.

My shoes were a bit more snug to get on than normal given they usually get rushed on without socks but I by-passed the water station as I was nowhere near overheating; the cold conditions were playing into my hands nicely. The trio reformed and at first I was last in the queue, but I eventually went up the middle and set my eyes on a GBR runner a couple of "cones" in front of me. He was an ideal target and I got him at the top of the rise just after the hairpin. I then pulled alongside Castelli Man but then I hit the redline and had to drop back, which then cost me another place to his teammate. After finally getting past my initial target I was the meat in a Castelli sandwich until the speedy sprinter ran off up the road. That was the first runner to pass me in a multi-sport race all year, but I made up for it by pasing someone wearing a baseball cap just before the last corner despite my stomach starting to knot up from the stress of having to sprint for every last second but with no-one else within striking range I could simply turn into the finishing chute, as I crossed the line 35th in a time of 1:06:34, a nine-and-a-half minute improvement on 2011!

After a pint of Erdinger alcohol-free lager I then high-tailed it to the Red Lion in Little Budworth where I enjoyed the traditional post-race nutrition of chicken balti and real ale, this time Dizzy Blonde Golden Ale from Robinsons of Stockport. While at the pub I met 80-year-old Andrew and his chumz from the nearby church. He told me the story of the missing Knickerbockers at THAT corner (apparently the US Army used the area as a base before going after Hitler) and about his son who did three Ironman events including Lanzarote. He was great company but come 12:40 it was time to get back to Oulton for the standard distance race, where I watched from Turn 1 as Ian Roberts came back from 11th entering T1 to place third overall and Daniel Gilbody grit out a sub-2:05 time despite cramping during the bike leg. It was a very eventful race which seemed to feature the other halves of husband and wife teams on bikes raced earlier that day; if only I could invite Lorraine Pascale to next year's event, she could do the sprint then give the Slice back to me for the full distance event........There were also two nasty collisions, one so bad it required the use of the Safety Car which must have given the newbies a big fright. A cracking day out had to end, and it duly did just after 3pm as I drove home having enjoyed a perfect day at the races. Shame we won't get in the paper this week, then again those rugby lads aren't doing too badly either.......

Now for the results, powered by Dizzy Blonde beer:

Distance: 4.3km/T1/21.5km/T2/4.3km
Times: 16:32/1:11/32:40/1:03/15:08 = 1:06:34 (Winner: Ian Lawton, 1:00:25)
PB Watch: My 2011 time minus 9:30
Bike Shares: at least 2 (Fuji Norcom and Wilier GTR)
GBR runners overtaken: Two on the bike, one on the last run
Post Race Nutrition: 10/10 (Chicken balti and beer, enough said)

REJECT OF THE RACE: Water-Proof Mark-Me-Up Numbers
(Troublesome but necessary in a triathlon; no point today and then we covered them with sleeves)

Time to get back to the second half of the Denver Broncos game. Well done to Tom and Gemma for winning KOM and QOM today!