One Last Hurrah, One Last Time - Saints Sign Off in South Manchester

So it was one last hurrah, one last time for St Helens Tri as the 2017 season ended where it began on the south side of Manchester, this time at the Wythenshawe University Playing Fields. This venue was only added to the calendar last season and has already become a firm favourite among those who like long straights to stretch the legs. Kind of like a Monza to Boggart Hole's Monaco if you will. However, I almost didn't get there in time, just like seven weeks ago at Heaton Park. This time it was thankfully not because a reckless driver broke the central reservation on the motorway, but rather because a bus tried to do a 17 point turn into the car park, burnt the clutch out and blocked the entrance! Worse still, Lee Stinch AKA Paloma Faith's Number 2 Fan (you can guess who number 1 is) was on car park duties and sent us all to park on the road in a very right housing estate which is akin to those found in and around the likes of Norris Green or West Derby. Luckily, I had a back up plan, to park on Fell Park Road and then bomb it over the M60 bridge to get to the race venue. This was easily done given the short wheelbase of the Toyota Yaris and even better, there was a clubhouse to get changed and relieve oneself before checking on how the ladies team did. It's safe to say I was delighted with the result; Myka Heard tightened her trip on the title race with a resounding win, Lynette Houghton gave my NRG4 teammate chase all the way and Helen Broderick made up for her Heaton Park disappointment by placing an excellent third. I went off to warm up with Kevin Richardson who apparently knows HMCC's very own David Rodgers (our Irish Man Utd fan who doesn't understand the rugby bonus points system) and come 2:25pm it was time to line up at the start, wait an eternity to be sent in our way and finally begun one short, and three long, loops of a fast if slippery course.

I didn't get a great start and spent most of the first mini loop behind David Gaskell while marvelling at how well Adam O'Shea glides over mud. As the mini loop began I passed our resident rugby player who commentated "Rob moving up the field here" and set about chasing Adam. Meanwhile, Kev Dunbar was coming back from a similarly difficult start and on the first downhill he said "attack those descents Rob". I decided not to hold him up and he went past, eventually taking both Che Heard and Michael Forber in what could be a decisive move for the overall points series title. For my part I was still dealing with Adam who was very much the Red Bull-Renault to my Mercedes; one having great handling, the other having the stronger engine. This trend meant that I could get close on the flat sections but he was so much more proficient on the technical bits and as such I had to wait until part way round the second lap to finally pull ahead. On this second tour I actually got quite close to Michael Forber for a few precious minutes before his better handling saw him pull away, not for the first or last time either. Also, Mark Glynn, who got a brilliant start, slowed dramatically with a pulled hamstring while audibly wondering if we had enough over the line to get a league placing! Now that's what you call commitment to the cause; here's hoping it's not too serious and our leading Ironman of 2017 is feeling better soon. As we approached the pit straight for the second time I picked out our fanbase cheering as part of the loudest crowd away from the Capital FM Jingle Bell Ball and waved to them, just as a Sale Harriers runner was warned to stay within the course limits or he'd be disqualified for running on the grass instead of the mud. Why didn't I think of that? Anyway, there was only one more lap to go and as such I set about trying to race others around me to get the team as many points as possible. This was a three way fight between me, a Manchester Frontrunner and the aforementioned Sale Harrier who had been allowed to stay in the race. These two got away from me in the hairpin turns through the muddiest parts of the course but once out of the worst of it I could begin my favourite bit of any race; the YOLO! That's right, I closed up on the Manchester man at the first right hander before the pit straight, took a bette line through the two kinks and nailed the Sale runner on the straight before the last corner which leads you to the finish funnel away from the pit and paddock area. As such that was two victims accounted for and I made it home in just over 41 minutes and fourth of the St Helens club counters, not bad given my flamingo tendencies in such conditions and I've now got more points than in the whole of last season!

After that it was time to watch Kevin Dudley and Adam O'Shea complete the top six as the ladies team came over to congratulate us. We posed for a team photo and then set about the best methodology for tidying away cakes. In other words, eat them. There was plenty of discussion about Che's spike choice and Helen's attempts to get David to do a half ironman next year; here's a thought why not join me in the Cotswolds? With everyone going their separate ways I got a shower in the clubhouse, got changed and drove into Manchester parking up at the Royal Northern College of Music, where I studied for five years until 2008. Then it was a bus ride to Piccadilly Gardens in time for 5:45pm. What great timing that was, because what should be halfway between the bus station and the Arena but..........the CAT CAFE. That's right, the best visitor attraction Manchester has to offer, where you pay  £1 per five minutes and get unlimited hot and cold drinks though you pay for cakes, like the red velvet I chose. Now I hadn't eaten properly for five hours and it was somewhat ironic that here in Manchester I should be having an attack of the shakes prior to getting a bit of sugar down me (Ariana Grande also has the same problem if she eats too much sugar and has too much caffeine) but the kitties were hilarious. The little one, Keira, jumped on the table and started edging towards my cake! Now that's what you call an attempt to steal the Reject award off the Wythenshawe bus driver. The cake was good, the gingerbread latte even better, and so I could set about taking pictures and stroking the cats, at least when they weren't fighting with each other or messing with toys. There's also a "cat run" they can sprint up, they go much quicker uphill than I do for sure. As the place closed at 7pm it was time to head for the Christmas market where around 1,500 people showed the true Manchester spirit by turning out amidst a large police presence to sample various delights; in my case Turkish durum (an Asian wrap with lamb and salad plus chilli sauce), strawberry strudel (even better than apple) and the piece de resistance, a Beardo Stockport IPA, 6% strength (thankfully served in 330ml bottles). I also bought two bags of themed coffee (chocolate mint and Jamaican RUM) and a buzzing bee sticker to personalise my bike helmet, it'll make finding the bike in a triathlon pit lane easier for sure as well as showing support for the city I spent five years in. Come 8:30pm it was time to head back to the RNCM to pick up the car and go home to watch Match of the Day but what a way to finish the St Helens Tri 2017 season (possible waiting list place for the Chester Walls Boxing Day Race notwithstanding) and a brilliant way to begin the party season in style!

Now for the results, brought to you by Manchester's number 1 visitor attraction, the Cat Cafe:

Distance: about 10k
Time: 41:07
St Helens Tri placing:4/13
Broken Down Buses: 1
One to Watch Award: Adam O'Shea (watch out when he gets his pacing strategy correct, he's a natural)
Post Race Nutrition: 10/10 (Far too much sugar at the race venue, saved from collapse by red velvet cake at the cat cafe then Turkish durum, strudel and an IPA at the market)

REJECT OF THE RACE: The Wythenshawe bus
(Just as well I knew where Fell Park Road was, and how ironic no one parked the bus on the late kick off)

Time to get some shut eye before a short ride tomorrow, I'll do the hardest group ride possible but will have to turn for home no later than 11am. Well done to everyone who ran today and calling David Rodgers: here's your 2018 dual club membership in waiting!